Paul’s Reviews Of Assorted Random (mostly) B Movies:

• A Clockwork Orange: a B-Movie perspective.  Just because it’s a classic doesn’t mean we can’t view it as if it were trash.
• A Scanner Darkly, a semi-animated adaptation of the Philip K. Dick novel.
• Adventures In Dinosaur City, a children’s adventure of uncommon ridiculousness, featuring rubber dinosaur heads.
• Aeon Flux, a glamorous futuristic action movie based on an even more empty-headed cartoon.
• Art School Confidential — not really a B movie, but a more or less arty adaptation of Daniel Clowes’ underground comic, Eightball.
• Baise-moi, a nihilistic French thriller made by porn actresses, which includes hardcore sex.
• Bottoms Up, in which Jason Mewes romances Paris Hilton.  Yeah, exactly.  Jason Mewes as in Jay And Silent Bob.  And Paris Hilton.
• Boxing Helena, in which David Lynch’s daughter self-destructs her career before it can even start.
• Butterfly... our first unforgettable experience of living legend Pia Zadora.
• Caligula, the legendary failed attempt to unite grand epic filmmaking with porn.
• Two cheap eighties thrillers by Albert Pyun: Dangerously Close and Down Twisted.
• The First Spaceship On Venus, Roger Corman’s english-dubbed butchering of the first big attempt at an interplanetary adventure behind the iron curtain.
• Fuzz, a crude effort by primitive early man at combining comedy with cop action.
• Hotel, in which Mike Figgis brings the indie WTF.
• I Know Who Killed Me.  Lindsay Lohan attempts to salvage her career and reputation with some serious acting, in a movie that cannot be taken seriously.
• The Imaginarium Of Doctor Parnassus — in context.  This examination of the overall career and latest film of the great Terry Gilliam really doesn’t belong with B movies, but I don’t have any A-movie page.
• Nude On The Moon... the greatest cheap spaceship movie ever created.
• Three by the great French crapiste Jean Rollin: Rape Of The Vampire, Requiem For A Vampire, and Shiver Of The Vampires.
• Santo vs. the Martians — just like the name says: Santo, the mightiest of all masked luchadores, wrassles some Martians.
• Southland Tales — a big sprawling epic full of bold imagination and meaningful issues... as those things are conceived by an incoherent moron.
• Subhuman, in which a drug-addled loser is secretly protecting the human race from evil parasites.
• Tail Sting... Scorpions On A Plane!
• Teenage Caveman, in which Larry Clark’s special knack for wallowing in youthful hedonism goes post-apocalyptic.

(Note: If you want to read good reviews of B movies, you should go to And You Call Yourself A Scientist! instead.